Opus Dei Boston Bloggers

THE WAY #26

2009-04-18T08:50:00.000-07:00

"Matrimony is a holy sacrament. When the time comes for you to receive it, ask your spiritual adviser or your confessor to suggest a suitable book. And you will be better prepared to bear worthily the burdens of the home."

The two become one. My parents and my in-laws were beautiful examples of married love.

The Way #25

2009-04-18T08:35:00.000-07:00

"Don't Argue. Arguing seldom brings light, for the light is quenched by passion."

Some of us are not great at arguing; we shut down or walk away. Some things need to be defended and we have to speak up. We have to speak the truth but always with charity and compassion.

THE WAY #24

2009-04-18T05:10:00.000-07:00

"You are ambitious: for knowledge, for leadership, for great ventures. Good. Very good. But let it be for Christ, for LOVE."

Love really is all that matters. We need to put love into our environment wherever we are. The love we bring has to be strong, courageous, and demanding. That's not possible unless we are united to Christ. We need to pray and receive the sacraments.

THE WAY #23

2009-04-13T20:00:00.000-07:00

"You say that you can't do more? Could it not be that... you can't do less?"

What are our priorities? How do we spend our time? When children are little our time is spent trying to keep up. We make a morning offering and then the day takes off. Hopefully, we incorporate prayer and acts of virtue into our day so that we make an effort to improve: to get closer to God.

As we get older we have the opportunity to choose how we spend our time. If we're not improving we're getting worse.

THE WAY #22

2009-04-13T19:32:00.000-07:00

"Be firm. Be virile. Be a man. And then... be a saint."

I had a wonderful English teacher in junior high school who taught us not to be upset with male gender references. Yes, that was in the early sixties.

I don't, for a minute, think that this point shouldn't matter to women. Women need to be firm, be strong, be women and be saints.

THE WAY #21

2009-04-13T18:52:00.000-07:00

"Excuses. You will always find plenty if you want to avoid your obligations. What a profusion of well-thought-out nonsense!
Don't stop to consider it. Dismiss it and do your duty."

You can imagine how hard I laughed when I read point #21 after not making an entry in two years!

I have a number of good excuses. I could begin with two weddings and four grandchildren. There are two more weddings and at least one more grandchild before September.

There really aren't any excuses for loving less than we are able. We all have opportunities to spread love and we will have to answer for our missed opportunities.

THE WAY #20

2007-02-18T10:22:00.000-08:00

"It is inevitable that you should feel the rub of other people's characters against your own. After all, you are not a gold coin that everyone likes.

Besides, without that friction produced by contact with others, how would you ever lose those corners, those edges and projections — the imperfections and defects — of your character, and acquire the smooth and regular finish, the firm flexibility of charity, of perfection?

If your character and the characters of those who live with you were soft and sweet like sponge cake you would never become a saint."

It's tough when the ones we love are difficult to live with. When mothers describe their daughters to me and tell me how exasperating they are my first response is, "I bet you were just like her when you were her age." Usually their eyes get big and they nod. This world is where we need to grow in virtue. There is nothing like family to force us to improve. Thank God for giving us lots of opportunities to improve.

THE WAY #19

2007-02-18T10:21:00.001-08:00

"Will-power. A very important quality. Don't despise little things, for by the continual practice of denying yourself again and again in such things — which are never futile or trivial — with God's grace you will add strength and resilience to your character. In that way you will first become master of yourself, and then a guide, a chief, a leader: to compel and to urge and to inspire others, with your word, with your example, with your knowledge and with your power."

Maybe you have never wanted to be a leader, guide or chief. It doesn't matter. You still need to exercise your will-power, your self-control. Maybe you spend too much time in front of the TV...or the computer! Where is your spouse? What are the kids doing? Is there a friend who needs a visit? Deny yourself that little attachment and see what God wants you to do.

THE WAY #18

2007-02-18T10:21:00.000-08:00

"You persist in being worldly, superficial, scatter-brained, because you are a coward. What is it but cowardice not to want to face yourself?"

Teach your children to live in the real world and make it better. In order to make the world better they must live in reality. We need to know ourselves and fight to improve ourselves so that we can help the others. It begins when we face ourselves. God wants to help us. Give him a chance.

THE WAY #17

2007-02-18T10:20:00.000-08:00

"Don't succumb to that disease of character whose symptoms are inconstancy in everything, thoughtlessness in action and speech scatter-brained ideas: superficiality, in short.

Mark this well: unless you react in time — not tomorrow: now! — that superficiality which each day leads you to form those empty plans (plans 'so full of emptiness') will make of your life a dead and useless puppet."

It seems as if St. Josemaria has dealt with people like me. He understood a hormonal time-bomb. The ups and downs of life, the cycles in the church calendar, confession and Mass can all work together to help us begin again. Lent begins soon. It's time to dig down and struggle to improve, to love God better.

THE WAY #16

2007-02-18T10:18:00.000-08:00

"You a drifter? You... one of the crowd? You, who were born to be a leader! There is no room among us for the lukewarm. Humble yourself and Christ will set you aflame again with the fire of Love."

Humility is underrated. Pride is everywhere. It's strange to be reminded that you should be a leader and at the same time you should be humble. The two don't seem to go together. At the same time, humility and lukewarmness somehow do seem to go together, but they don't. Do you get the feeling that God arranges things in ways that we can't easily put into our little heads? I guess that's one reason why we need humility!

2006-09-30T08:51:00.000-07:00

The Way #15

"Don't put off your work until tomorrow."

You have to believe that God has a sense of humor! I have been away from this blog for over two months. I have many excuses but I won't bore you with them. Procrastinator is not a nice label; lazy is even worse. The trick is to fight our flaws with a sporting spirit and know that God loves us and is laughing with us as long as we continue to struggle. We are in this for the long haul.

2006-07-17T14:00:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #14

"Don't waste your time and your energy — which belong to God — throwing stones at the dogs that bark at you on your way. Ignore them."

St. Josemaria gave a meditation called "Time is a Treasure". We have constant opportunities to be efficient and work hard. We also have more opportunities to waste time. Won't it be interesting at the end of our lives when we should account for the time we have been given?

I think that God wants us to love more. Did I spread love today? Make that phone call? Serve that special dessert? Did I waste my time worring about something that I can't do anything about?

2006-07-16T11:19:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #13

"Get rid of those useless thoughts which, at best, are but a waste of time."

Why is it that we sometimes let our imagination run wild? We imagine conversations that we never had, difficulties that probably won't happen, things people said years ago... Imagine how much time is wasted and how much harm is done by useless thoughts. Wouldn't it be better to read, exercise or pray?

2006-07-16T11:11:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #12

"Let those very obstacles give you strength. God's grace will not fail you: 'Inter medium montium pertransibunt aquae! You shall pass through the mountains!'

Does it matter that you have to curtail your activity for the moment if afterwards, like a spring which has been compressed, you will reach incomparably farther than you ever dreamed?"

This point in the way helped me through nine pregnancies. It isn't easy to detach yourself from your own strength and vitality. I think of that often as I get older. Sometimes I need to ask for help. Hopefully, I remember to ask God.

2006-07-16T11:01:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #11

"Will-power. Energy. Example. What has to be done, is done... without hesitation, without more worrying. Otherwise, Teresa of Avila would not have been Saint Teresa: nor Iñigo of Loyola, Saint Ignatius. God and daring! 'We want Christ to reign!'"

I love St. Teresa. I've been reading a book about her. She was my age when she was traveling through Spain opening convents. All I have to do is help organize a wedding. The wedding is six weeks away and will be a joyful celebration of love. We need to put people before things and God above it all.

2006-06-06T15:16:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #10

"Never correct anyone while you are still indignant about a fault committed. Wait until the next day, or even longer. And then, calmly, and with a purer intention, make your reprimand. You will gain more by one friendly word than by a three-hour quarrel. Control your temper."

This works for parents too. I remember a woman who was angry with her son. She had a brush in her hand and knew that she should drop the brush before speaking to her son. Parents don't always have the opportunity to wait a day or two before disciplining a child but it would be better to wait and miss the immediate opportunity and rectify your intention. Think: What offence did he commit?

2006-06-05T11:52:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #9

"Say what you have just said, but in a different tone, without anger, and your argument will gain in strength and, above all, you won't offend God."

Did your mom ever tell you to count to ten? There is wisdom in those old ideas. For the love of God and neighbor we need to develop self control. We need to help our children develop self control. We don't need to return to an era of stuffiness, but letting it all hang out is not helping society.

2006-05-28T10:35:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #8

"Serenity. Why lose your temper if by doing so you offend God, annoy other people, upset yourself... and have to find it again in the end?"

I am a fairly calm person...most days. I owe it to my parents who were fairly calm. When serenity is more fleeting it helps me to TRY to think with a supernatural outlook. What does God want me to do with this mess? What is the big picture? What can be learned? What can be sanctified? I also pray, "Soul, be calm".

2006-05-28T10:25:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #7

"Get rid of that 'small-town' outlook. Enlarge your heart till it becomes universal, 'catholic'.
Don't flutter about like a hen, when you can soar to the heights of an eagle."

I've just returned from a retreat. Who would think that to be more universal, to be able to soar like an eagle, it's important to pull away for a few days? We need to gain perspective and that is too difficult when we are in the day to day struggle. Parents need to step back and place their concerns on the patten at Mass.

2006-05-18T12:13:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #6

"Turn your back on the tempter when he whispers in your ear: 'Why make life difficult for yourself?'"

When I was growing up in Wisconsin I was Episcopalian. I remember the Bishop came to church and gave a sermon. The line he repeated several times was, "The trouble with the world today is that good people get tired of doing good before bad people get tired of doing bad." It's hard to choose good day after day. It takes effort. It is worthwhile!

2006-05-13T12:14:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #5

"Get used to saying no."

Parents need to ask themselves; What do I want my child to be like when he goes off to college? You need to say no to them before they go there. They need to see you say no to yourself.

2006-05-12T15:59:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #4

"Don't say: 'That's the way I'm made... it's my character'. It's your lack of character: Be a man."

My seventh grade english teacher taught us that we should understand that we could substitute woman in this sentance. That was back in 1962 and "things were different" then. I remember one day when she spoke to me, "Miss Daggett. you're running around this classroom like a chicken with its head cut off. Sit down!" I think of her when I'm having a bad hormone day. I'm still working on my character. I hope it's improving and that my children notice the struggle.

2006-05-07T07:41:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #3

"Maturity. Stop acting the child; drop that affectation that only suits a silly girl. Let your outward conduct reflect the peace and order of your soul."

For some of us this is very difficult. Some of us do not reflect peace and order because we are not peaceful or orderly. God can help us. Ask him for peace and order in your soul. People are attracted to peaceful and orderly souls.

2006-05-07T07:21:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #2

"How I wish your bearing and conversation were such that, on seeing or hearing you, people would say: This man reads the life of Jesus Christ."

Parents want their children to grow up to be mature, charitable adults. God wants the same for all of us. We are his children. The books our children read impact their memories and imagination for years to come. Encourage your children and their teachers to choose good books. Their books should encourage virtue, with heroes who are brave, daring and compassionate.

2006-05-05T13:49:00.000-07:00

THE WAY #1

"Don't let your life be barren. Be useful. Make yourself felt. Shine forth with the torch of your faith and your love."

With your apostolic life, wipe out the trail of filth and slime left by the corrupt sowers of hatred. And set aflame all the ways of the earth with the fire of Christ that you bear in your heart."

Parents have the great reponsibility to raise their children to be sowers of love. Children are idealistic. Thier idealism, when combined with their parent's love and faith, can change the world.

2006-03-17T14:10:00.000-08:00

Point 279 in The Way: "People see only the flat surface. Their vision is two-dimensional and fixed to the ground. When you live a supernatural life, God will give you the third-dimension: height, and with it, perspective, weight and volume."

People frequently ask me what it's like to raise a large family. My response varies depending on the seriousness of the person asking the question. My life is a great adventure. My children are accomplishing wonderful things that make society better. The best advice I could give to anyone who is attemting to raise a family is to keep your eyes on the goal. The goal is not financial or academic. The goal is heaven. Parents have about seventeen years to prepare their children for the big world. Children learn by watching. Are you honest? Do you pray? Are you charitable?

2006-03-07T09:43:00.000-08:00

Point 824 in The Way: "Have you noticed how human love consists of little things? Well, divine love also consists of little things".

Did I tell you we have a wedding coming up? Brian, the fellow who took the Christmas picture, is marrying our daughter Tricia. Tricia and Brian have known each other for years. They attended different colleges, dated other people and have been best friends before falling in love. Their wedding will be eclectic. The wedding will be traditional but there will be seven young people escorting the bride and groom; in addition to the bidesmaids and groomsmen. The reception will have a Latin sound to it due to the band that will be playing but it will be in a very Brahmin location. We're thrilled to have Brian and his family join our family.

2006-02-25T15:34:00.000-08:00

Sunday dinner at the Bowman's has become a tradition. Bill's family always ate Sunday dinner at his grandmother's house. Now we're hosting dinner at our house. Whoever can come will let me know. I figure it's a great chance for the kids to get together and laugh. They also bring laundry. I don't do their laundry. I just provide the machine, beer, and dinner. Several years ago I began thinking of our home as an oasis where people come to be refreshed. We all need to practice love and it's up to mom and dad to create opportunities. On a typical Sunday there will be a few people in front of the fireplace (or on the deck in the summer) A few will be watching a sporting event on TV. Some will be helping to prepare the meal and set the table. Children will be at the computer, drawing, or playing with trucks. Mostly, what I hear is laughter.

Meet the family!

2006-02-20T16:09:00.000-08:00

Bill and I are down front, holding our two grandchildren in pink. All nine children, three spouses, and five grandchildren got together at Christmas and sat still long enough to take this picture (thanks, Brian!)

Blessed Ordinariness!

2006-02-20T14:50:00.000-08:00

One of the things that attracted Bill and me to Opus Dei was its celebration of ordinary life. That's where most of us live... in the middle of the world, doing professional work, worrying about our kids, celebrating family events... all the stuff that never makes headlines. But also the stuff that gives us the most joy! The idea that this ordinary life could become THE way to grow closer to God was revolutionary to us. But what great news! All the things we do every day, the sacrifices we make, the struggles we endure, the joys we celebrate... all of this, if offered to God, becomes prayer, and through it we draw closer to God. No withdrawal from the world to a monastary, no special religious garb to wear, just living ordinary life... but with a new twist. All the events of everyday are offered to God, and because we don't want to offer something poorly done, we strive to do that work well.

Revolutionary? Absolutely. Controversial? Not once you understand what its simple message is. "The Sanctification of Ordinary Work" is a beautiful way of life.